Dead Alive

I am tired and out of town. I have been playing hours upon hours of Call of Duty 4 online trying to become a General. That being said my brain is fried and my eyes scorched. I will not promise even an attempt at a well written review. These are my jumbled thoughts.

This is the most ridiculous movie I believe I've ever seen. Peter Jackson has successfully given me the most blood captured by camera...probably ever. My repetitive use of "amazing" has been replaced with "ridiculous" in describing Dead Alive. When thinking back I can only fumble for the words to describe its ridiculousness. Here, I'll try...

Rats from exploring ships have crawled off and onto Skull Island(uh...Kong?) for a little nonconsenual(is that the right word?) sex with the local monkeys. What results is somehow an undead breeding hybrid of the species. A group of zoologists have captured one of these monkey's and taken it back to the main land zoos. Through a twist of love and fate the controlling mother of two hopeless romantics is bitten by this squat of a creature which will result in a massive undead fest of lawn mower thrashing, kung fu preacher kicking, puss squirting, limb flying, baby blending, dog eating, blood geysing, eye ball plucking, ear eating, basement locking, banana slipping, tranquilizer nosing, head flopping, skin bubbling, human X-mas tree lighting, evil Uncle splitting, zombie breeding, funeral crashing, green ooze flowing, pudding eating, intestine chasing, lung chasing, etc etc...oh Peter Jackson, what have you created. I will admit that it looks like the film was a hilariously fun movie to make.

I don't recommend this to anyone except maybe Adam and Nick Stewart, and to you two I say it's perfect for the boxers, tube sox, and KFC family meals. Again...I have never seen this much gore on one DVD.

Reviewed by: shea
2 Comment(s)
Josh said...
Any movie that has a kung-fu fighting priest taking on zombies is alright with this guy. Besides, this is pure Jackson, not the Hollywood beast he's become since the Lord of the Rings movies.
Chris said...
I havn't seen this movie, but your imagery in the long list of "STUFF INSIDE THE BOX" makes me almost want to break down and see it for the pure humor.